STORY BY
Max Ehrlich
TELEPLAY BY
Max Ehrlich
&
Gene L. Coon
DIRECTED BY
Joseph Pevney
AIRED ON
October 13, 1967
RUNTIME
50 minutes
STARRING
VIEWS
229
LAST UPDATE
2024-09-19 10:58:55
PAGE VERSION
Version 5
LIKES
0
DISLIKES
1
SUMMARY
No summary yet.
STORY
No story yet.
BEHIND THE SCENES
No trivia yet.
QUOTES
Kirk: Trying to get yourself killed. Do you know how much Starfleet has invested in you?
Spock: One hundred twenty two thousand two hundred––
Kirk: Never mind!
Akuta: Love. Strange words. Children. Love. What is love?
Martha: Love is when two people are––
(Chekov demonstrates by putting his arm around her waist.)
Akuta: Ah, yes. The holding, the touching. Vaal has forbidden this.
McCoy: Well, there goes paradise.
Martha: But these people... I mean, if they don't know anything about... What I mean is... they don't seem to have any natural... um... I mean... how is it... done?
Martha: You know, if it weren't for Vaal this place would be a paradise.
Chekov: Any place we can be together is paradise.
Scott: There's nothing left to try again. I guess you'll have to fire me, sir.
Kirk: You're fired.
Scott: I'll have all engineering sections working on the circuits immediately. Transporter'll be ready in an hour.
Kirk: Scotty, you're re-hired.
Kirk: You'll learn to care for yourselves, with our help. And there's no trick to putting fruit on trees. You might enjoy it.
Kirk: Are you casting me in the role of Satan?
Spock: Not at all, Captain.
Kirk: Is there anyone on this ship who even remotely looks like Satan?
Spock: I am not aware of anyone who fits that description, Captain.
Kirk: No, Mister Mr. I didn't think you would be.
FILMING LOCATIONS
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REVIEWS
A sexless planet
Written by
Pike on 2020-03-25
★
A very bad episode right from the beginning.
SEXLESS
To summarize, Kirk and his crew beam down onto a planet that seems apparently not hostile. But suddenly, they meet killer plants and a tribe of odd people that don't make love.
Suddenly, they realize that sex is good.
Therefore, this is another episode of Star Trek about sex, following some previous cases:
- "The Man Trap" (Season 1, Episode 1)
A shape-shifting alien creature lures victims by transforming into someone they desire, focusing on how desire and attraction can be manipulated.
- "Mudd's Women" (Season 1, Episode 6)
Harry Mudd, a recurring character, brings three beautiful women to a mining colony. The episode explores how physical attractiveness and sexual allure can influence people.
- "Shore Leave" (Season 1, Episode 15)
The crew experiences hallucinations based on their deepest desires. One character encounters a love interest from his past.
- "The Enemy Within" (Season 1, Episode 5)
A transporter accident splits Captain Kirk into two versions, one of which is aggressive and exhibits unchecked desires. The episode examines human nature and how our instincts and impulses, including sexual ones, are part of who we are.
- "Amok Time" (Season 2, Episode 1)
This episode focuses on Spock's biology and the Vulcan mating ritual known as pon farr, where Spock must return to Vulcan to mate or die, exploring primal instincts and relationships in Vulcan culture.
THE RED SHIRT MALEDICTION
This episode is a prime example of the red shirt malediction, meaning that the crew members wearing red shirts have a tendency to always be the ones killed during the episode.
VERDICT
A really awful and boring episode, the worst one this season, along with 2x02 Who Mourns with Adonis.
I give it 1 out of 5.
___________________________________________
Fruitful Follies and the Birds and the Bees: Kirk’s Space-age Sex Ed Adventure
Written by
lilly on 2024-09-16
★
In
The Apple, the
Star Trek episode that turns a seemingly idyllic planet into a hilariously misguided exercise in pre-space-age romance, Captain Kirk and his crew land on a world where the inhabitants are so clueless about sex that they think “making love” involves sending a fruit basket.
The episode begins with the
Enterprise crew landing on a planet that looks like it was designed by someone who took a farm-to-table concept way too literally. The locals, a bunch of overly friendly cave-dwellers, live in a fruit-filled paradise under the strict rule of Vaal, a glowing red orb that has apparently replaced common sense with a fruit salad.
Everything seems peachy until Kirk and his team discover that the planet’s inhabitants are blissfully ignorant about some very basic aspects of human interaction, particularly when it comes to romance and procreation. The locals are so wrapped up in their fruit-worshipping rituals that they don’t have a clue about the concept of making babies—or as they call it, "fruit production"—which makes them about as knowledgeable about human relationships as a bag of potatoes.
Kirk’s attempts to explain the birds and the bees to these innocent folks are both hilarious and cringe-worthy. The conversations are like trying to explain modern art to someone who’s never seen a painting; it’s awkward, confusing, and everyone’s left feeling like they’re missing a fundamental piece of the puzzle. The locals seem to think that if they just keep tending their fruit and worshiping Vaal, everything will work out on its own—kind of like if your idea of parenting was to give your kids a garden gnome and hope for the best.
The best part? The “love” scenes, or rather the lack thereof, are portrayed with the kind of baffling innocence that makes you question whether these people have ever had a proper biology lesson. They seem to think that creating new life involves some sort of mystical ritual involving fruit offerings and maybe a few well-placed chants. It's like a bizarre combination of fruit picking and matchmaking.
Kirk’s frustration with the situation reaches new heights when he realizes that the locals’ complete lack of understanding about reproduction is the result of Vaal’s totalitarian regime. Vaal’s control over the planet is so extreme that it’s managed to make the concept of human intimacy a complete mystery, leading to a comedic mix of misunderstandings and desperate attempts to educate.
In the end, Kirk and his crew manage to free the inhabitants from their fruit-centric overlord, and the locals are left to figure out the mysteries of love and reproduction on their own terms. It’s a classic
Star Trek wrap-up where, despite the comedic chaos, there’s a hopeful note about the power of self-discovery and breaking free from outdated customs.
Overall,
The Apple is a laugh-out-loud episode that combines space farming with a crash course in human relationships. Kirk’s space-age sex ed adventure is a reminder that even in the far future, some planets still need a serious lesson in the basics of human intimacy—preferably without the fruit baskets and orbs of doom.
TRANSCRIPT
[Planet surface]
(Kirk, Spock, Chekov, Yeoman Landon and two guards have beamed down to study a new world.)
KIRK: Start your readings.
(McCoy and two more guards beam down.)
MCCOY: Well, I just might stake out a claim and settle down here, Jim.
KIRK: It is spectacular, isn't it?
MCCOY: It's a shame to have to intrude.
KIRK: Well, the last scout ship reported some pretty strange sensor readings. Starfleet wants it investigated and the inhabitants contacted. We do what we're told.
SPOCK: The soil here is remarkably rich and fertile, Captain. Husbandry would be quite efficacious.
KIRK: Are you sure about that?
SPOCK: Oh, quite sure. Readings indicate the entire planet is covered with growth like this. Curious, even at the poles there's very little variation in temperature which maintains a planet-wide average of seventy six degrees.
KIRK: I know. Almost impossible.
CHEKOV: It makes me homesick. Just like Russia.
MCCOY: More like the Garden of Eden, Ensign.
CHEKOV: Of course, Doctor. The Garden of Eden was just outside Moscow. A very nice place. It must have made Adam and Eve very sad to leave.
KIRK: Just outside Moscow. All right. There's a village about seventeen kilometres away on bearing two three two. We'll head that way.
(A planet turns to face the away team, and a guard walks up to it.)
HENDORFF: Captain.
(The plant fires its stamens into his chest, and he falls.)
MCCOY: Dead.
KIRK: What did somebody say? That paradise must've looked like this?
Captain's log, stardate 3715.3. While making a routine exploration of the unexplored Gamma Trianguli Six, one of my men has been killed by a poisonous plant.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: As soon as we get out of the way, beam the body up.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, Captain. It's a shame about Hendorff.
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: We seem to have a problem here, too.
KIRK: What is it?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: We're losing potency in our antimatter pods. I don't think it's serious, but we're looking into it.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: What's causing it?
SCOTT [OC]: I'm not sure, sir, but we've run measurements on the electromagnetic field of the planet, and they are a wee bit abnormal. That might have something to do with it.
KIRK: But you say there's nothing to worry about?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Well, sir, I didn't exactly say that.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Well, stay on top of it. We've got a job to down here. We might as well finish it.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: I hear it's nice down there.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Yeah, it's nice. If we're a little more careful, we shouldn't run into any more trouble.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: I could do with a nice walk in a garden with green leaves and grass.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: We'll do the walking, Scotty. You get on the antimatter pod. If it gets worse, let me know, we'll beam up. Kirk out.
SPOCK: I find that most unusual, Captain.
KIRK: Scotty will handle it. We've got a job to do. Turn up anything on your tricorder?
SPOCK: Indeed. Subsurface vibrations for miles in all directions.
KIRK: That's strange.
SPOCK: Quite strong, fairly regular, artificially produced.
KIRK: Mallory.
MALLORY: Yes, Captain?
KIRK: We're heading for the village. Avoid contact with the humanoids. I want you and Marple to make a full reconnaissance. And be careful. There may be other dangers besides poisonous plants. Keep in constant communication.
MALLORY: Aye, aye, sir.
SPOCK: Captain.
KIRK: What is it?
SPOCK: There's a humanoid hiding directly behind us, moving with remarkable agility, bearing one eight.
(Kirk nods to a guard, and they go to flank their observer.)
CHEKOV: What is it, Mister Spock?
SPOCK: A visitor. One wanting to retain his anonymity, I should say.
MARTHA: All this beauty, and now Mister Hendorff dead, somebody watching us. It's frightening.
CHEKOV: If you insist on worrying, worry about me. I've been wanting to get you in a place like this for a long time.
KIRK: Mister Chekov, Yeoman Landon. I know you find each other fascinating, but we're not here to conduct a field experiment in human biology.
CHEKOV: I was about to take some readings.
SPOCK: Anything?
KIRK: Whatever it is, it moves like a cat.
MCCOY: Jim, I don't like this.
KIRK: Neither do I. All hands. We've been watched, we'll probably be watched. We're moving out. Formation L.
(They set off in single file, a guard in the lead and Chekov bringing up the rear.)
(Along the way, Spock notices a very flat rock and picks it up.)
SPOCK: Interesting. Extremely low specific gravity, some uraninite, hornblende, quartz. (breaks it in half) Fragile, good cleavage. An analysis should prove interesting.
(He throws one half away, and it explodes when it hits the ground.)
KIRK: Would you mind being careful where you throw your rocks, Mister Spock?
SPOCK: Obviously highly unstable, Captain. This could be a find of some importance. In large quantities, it could be a considerable source of power.
KIRK: Garden of Eden, with land mines.
(Spock puts the other piece of rock down very carefully, and they continue their route march. An occasional bush rustle indicates they are being watched.)
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Enterprise to Captain Kirk.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Kirk here.
SCOTT [OC]: Scott, sir. Our antimatter pods are completely inert.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: I couldn't stop it, but I know why.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Why?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Something from the surface. It's like a pail of water on a fire. A beam, maybe, or a transmission. And it's still on. I'm having it analysed, but it's like nothing I've seen before.
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: And it's pinpointed in the area of that village we located down there.
KIRK: We're heading there now, Scotty. You need any help?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: There's nothing you can do about it, sir.
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: There doesn't seem to be any immediate danger.
KIRK: All right, Scotty. We'll try and find out what's going on down here. Kirk out.
SPOCK: If Scott is correct about the force from the surface, it may have to do with the vibrations I read earlier.
KIRK: Some kind of generator?
SPOCK: If so, an immense one. Probably subterranean.
(McCoy is scanning something.)
KIRK: What's that?
MCCOY: Some of the thorns like those that killed Hendorff. See the stuff on the end? It's like saplin, only it's a thousand times stronger.
KIRK: Peculiar stuff to find in paradise.
SPOCK: (noticing a plant moving) Jim!
(He pushes the Captain and McCoy out of the way, but takes the thorns in his own chest.) KIRK: Spock! Spock! Security alert. Is he alive?
(McCoy injects Spock.)
MCCOY: I filled him with enough masiform D to make the whole crew turn handsprings, and he's not responding. Got to get him back to the ship, Jim.
KIRK: Kirk to Enterprise.
SCOTT [OC]: Scott here, sir.
KIRK: We're beaming up. Notify transporter room. And make arrangements to pick up Mallory and Marple. They're scouting ahead of us.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, aye, sir. Transporter room, stand by to beam up landing party.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: All hands.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Standing by, sir.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Energise.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Energise.
[Planet surface]
(Three times the landing party start to dematerialise, and each time they fail to vanish.)
KIRK: Scotty, energise. Scotty, what's the matter?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: We can't make transporter contact, sir. The entire system's inhibited. The way it is now, we couldn't beam up a fly.
Captain's log, supplementary, Our investigation of Gamma Trianguli Six has suddenly turned into a nightmare. We're being watched and followed, Mister Spock has been injured, and now we find we are unable to return to the ship.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Scotty, is the transporter malfunction tied in with trouble you're having with the antimatter pods?
SCOTT: I don't know, sir. I'll check it and get back with you. Scott out.
(Spock starts to sit up.)
KIRK: Spock. Are you all right?
SPOCK: Doctor McCoy's potion is acting like all his potions, turning my stomach. Other than that, I am quite well.
MCCOY: If your blood were red instead of green, you wouldn't have an upset stomach.
KIRK: Just what do you think you were trying to do?
SPOCK: I surmised you were unaware of that plant, so I
KIRK: Stepped in front and took the thorns yourself.
SPOCK: I assure you, Captain, I had no intention of doing that. It was merely my own clumsiness prevented me which prevented me from moving out of the way.
KIRK: I see. Well next time, just yell. I can step out of the way as quickly as the next man.
SPOCK: I shall do so.
KIRK: Trying to get yourself killed. Do you know how much Starfleet has invested in you?
SPOCK: One hundred twenty two thousand two hundred
KIRK: Never mind. But thanks. Kaplan, take the post.
KAPLAN: Yes, sir.
KIRK: Not only is something after us, but it's after the ship as well.
SPOCK: Captain, to affect the ship at this extreme range would require a highly sophisticated planetary defence system.
(It goes dark.)
KIRK: Thirty seconds ago, there wasn't a cloud in the sky.
(A lightning strike hits Kaplan, and he is burnt to ash instantly.)
KIRK: Come on!
(They take cover, and the storm passes as quickly as it came. They find the smoldering remains of Kaplan.)
KIRK: Phasers. A beautiful day, Mister Spock. Not a cloud in the sky. Just like paradise. (The scouting party has reached a collection of round huts - very African.)
KIRK: Kirk here.
[Village]
MALLORY: Mallory here, Captain. I'm near the village. Co-ordinates, one one eight by two two zero.
[Planet surface]
(But Kirk only hears static and a faint voice.)
KIRK: Mallory. Mallory, you all right? Come in!
[Village]
MALLORY: The village is primitive. Strictly tribal from the looks of it. And Captain, there's something else. Captain, come in.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Mallory. Mallory, you all right? Mallory!
SPOCK: Captain. Those co-ordinates are a short distance in that direction.
KIRK: On the double.
(They run off, sort of. Meanwhile Mallory is running for his life.)
MALLORY: It's over there! That way! I never saw anything like
(He steps on one of those exploding rocks.)
KIRK: Mallory! Marple, stand back! Watch it! The rocks! (kneeling by the body) Kaplan. Hendorff. I know Kaplan's family. Now Mallory.
MCCOY: Jim, you couldn't have stopped any of this.
KIRK: His father helped me get into the Academy.
SPOCK: Captain. In each case, this was unavoidable.
KIRK: I could've prevented all of it.
SPOCK: I don't see how.
KIRK: A walk in paradise, among the green grass and flowers. We should've beamed up at the first sign of trouble.
SPOCK: You are under orders to investigate this planet and this culture.
KIRK: I also have the option to disregard those orders if I consider them overly hazardous. This isn't that important a mission, Spock. Not worth the lives of three of my men. I drop my guard for a minute because I like the smell of growing things, and now three men are dead. And the ship's in trouble.
SPOCK: No one has ever stated that Starfleet duty was particularly safe. You've followed the correct and logical course, done everything a commander could do. Self-recriminations (he pauses) Captain, our friend is back.
KIRK: Marple, Chekov, at attention. Gentlemen, something or someone is behind that rock. I want it. Marple, cut around the rock to your right. Make a loud noise. Be careful. (Marple leaves) Spock, you and Chekov create a diversion and make it loud.
SPOCK: Mister Chekov, your tricorder readings are totally inefficient!
CHEKOV: Mind your own business, sir! For your information, I have a very high efficiency rating.
SPOCK: Ensign, I will not have you address me in that tone of voice!
CHEKOV: What do you want, violence?
(Kirk catches their observer, and hits him as he tries to run away. To his astonishment, the white-haired male begins to cry.)
KIRK: I won't hurt you. Do you understand? I won't hurt you.
AKUTA: You struck me. With your hand.
KIRK: Well, I won't strike you again. You've been following us, watching us. Why?
AKUTA: I am the eyes of Vaal. He must see.
KIRK: Who is Vaal?
AKUTA: Vaal is Vaal. He is everything.
KIRK: Do you have a name?
AKUTA: I am Akuta. I am the leader of the feeders of Vaal.
(Spock and the others arrive.)
KIRK: They're not going to hurt you. I promise you. Akuta, Akuta, we come in peace. We would like to speak to this Vaal.
AKUTA: Akuta alone speaks to Vaal. I am the eyes and the voice of Vaal. It is Vaal's wish.
SPOCK: Captain, this is fascinating. If you will permit me, sir?
(Akuta has metal wires sticking out behind from behind his ears.)
KIRK: Antennae?
AKUTA: They are my ears for Vaal. They were given to me in the dim time so the people could understand his commands and obey.
KIRK: You speak of the people of Vaal. Are they nearby?
AKUTA: We are close to Vaal so we may serve him. I shall take you there.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Enterprise to Captain Kirk.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Kirk here.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Condition red. Condition red. Captain, something has grabbed us from the planet surface
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: Like a giant tractor beam, and we can't break loose.
[Bridge]
KYLE: It's no use, Mister Scott. We're just barely holding our own.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Scotty, are the warp drives still out?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, sir. All we have is impulse power.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Put it on maximum. Full emergency circuits.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: They're all on, Captain.
KIRK [OC]: Status, are you still holding?
SCOTT: Kyle?
KYLE: No, sir. We're slipping.
SCOTT: Computer banks, Kyle. Feed in a rate, get me a figure. We might be able to pull out with warp drive, but without it
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: We're like a fly on fly paper. Even worse
[Bridge]
SCOTT: We're starting to lose ground. Hurry up on that figure, Kyle.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Maintain full reverse thrust against the pull. Put a team on that warp drive. Get it working.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: I've done that, Captain. They haven't been able to do a thing. (Kyle hands him a PADD) It's no good, Captain. With maximum thrust against the pull
[Planet surface]
SCOTT [OC]: We'll only be able to maintain full power for sixteen hours, then we burn up for sure.
KIRK: Scotty, you're my Chief Engineer. You know everything about that ship there is to know. More than the men who designed it. If you can't get those warp engines working
[Bridge]
KIRK [OC]: You're fired.
SCOTT: I'll do everything there is to do, sir. Scott out.
[Planet surface]
KIRK: Tell me about Vaal.
AKUTA: All the world knows about Vaal. He causes the rains to fall and the sun to shine. All good comes from Vaal.
KIRK: Take me to him. I wish to speak to him.
AKUTA: I shall take you to him, but he will not speak to you. He speaks only to me.
KIRK: I'll take my chances.
[Vaal]
(Akuta leads them to a giant rock serpent head with green and yellow eyes, sticking out of a cliff. It looks like there is a fire in it's throat.)
AKUTA: Vaal.
Captain's log, stardate 3715.6. We have been introduced to Vaal. Evidently the source of the planet's power emanations and possibly the force that threatens both us and our ship.
[Vaal]
SPOCK: Fascinating. A very high order of workmanship, very ancient, generating great power.
KIRK: But this is not the centre, Mister Spock.
SPOCK: No, Captain. The centre is deep in the earth beneath us. This is an access point. It would also seem to be a
(He steps forward and is flung back.)
KIRK: A force field?
SPOCK: Obviously.
KIRK: You all right?
SPOCK: Yes, quite. It extends some thirty feet beyond the figure in all directions. Conventional in composition, and quite formidable.
KIRK: Akuta, how do you talk to Vaal?
AKUTA: Vaal calls me. Only then.
KIRK: Well, we can't get to it. We can't talk to it unless it wants to talk to us.
AKUTA: Vaal sleeps now. When he is hungry, you may be able to speak with him, if he desires it.
KIRK: When does he get hungry?
AKUTA: Soon. Come. We will give you food and drink. If you are tired, you may rest.
[Village]
AKUTA: These are the people of Vaal.
(Everyone is grown up, with white hair and wearing a simple cotton sarong.)
KIRK: Where are the others?
AKUTA: There are no others.
KIRK: The children.
AKUTA: Children? You use unknown words to me.
KIRK: Little ones like yourselves. They grow.
AKUTA: Replacements. None are necessary. They are forbidden by Vaal.
MARTHA: But when a man and woman fall in love,
AKUTA: Love. Strange words. Children. Love. What is love?
MARTHA: Love is when two people are
(Chekov demonstrates by putting his arm around her waist.)
AKUTA: Ah, yes. The holding, the touching. Vaal has forbidden this.
MCCOY: Well, there goes paradise.
AKUTA: These people, are from another place. They have come among us. Welcome them!
ALL: Welcome to Vaal.
SAYANA: (placing the equivalent of a lei around Kirk's wrist.) Our homes are open to you.
KIRK: Well, thank you. It does something for you.
SPOCK: Yes, indeed it does, Captain. It makes me uncomfortable.
SAYANA: I am Sayana. You have a name?
SPOCK: Yes. Spock. I am Spock.
SAYANA: (amid general merriment) Spock?
SPOCK: I fail to see what they find so amusing.
AKUTA: Come!
[Hut]
AKUTA: This house is your house. I will send you more food and drink. You are welcome in the place of Vaal.
CHEKOV: Now we're welcome. A while ago this whole planet was trying to kill us. It doesn't make sense.
KIRK: Nothing makes sense down here. Kirk to Enterprise.
SCOTT [OC]: Scott here.
KIRK: Status report, Scotty.
[Planet surface]
SCOTT: No change, Captain. The orbit is decaying along computed lines. No success with the warp drive. We're going down and we can't stop it.
[Hut]
KIRK: I'm sick of hearing that word can't. Get that ship out of there.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Sir, we're doing everything within engineering reason.
[Hut]
KIRK: Then use your imagination. Tie every ounce of power the ship has into the impulse engines. Discard the warp drive nacelles if you have to, and crack out of there with the main section, but get that ship out of there!
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Sir, I'm going to switch over everything but the life-support systems and boost the impulse power, but that's just about as dangerous.
[Hut]
KIRK: Do it. Kirk out.
MCCOY: Incredible.
KIRK: Report.
MCCOY: I just ran a thorough check on the natives, and there's a complete lack of harmful bacteria in their systems, no decalcification, no degeneration of tissue, no arteriosclerosis. In simple terms, Jim, they're not growing old, and I can't begin to tell you how old they are, twenty years or twenty thousand years.
KIRK: I see. Opinion.
SPOCK: Quite possible. It checks with my atmospheric analysis. Their atmosphere completely negates any harmful effects from their sun.
KIRK: Add to that a simple diet, a perfectly controlled temperature, no natural enemies, apparently no vices, no replacements needed. Maybe it is paradise after all.
(A gong sounds outside, and all the villagers are heading off towards Vaal.)
[Village]
KIRK: Mister Spock.
[Vaal]
(The villagers are walking into the serpent's mouth and depositing plates of fruit down it's throat. Kirk and Spock watch from behind a shrub.)
SPOCK: Apparently, our hypothesis is correct. There is no living being there. It is a machine, nothing more.
KIRK: Well, the field's down, people are going in. Let's see what kind of luck we have.
(But as soon as they stand, the eyes light up and there is a rumble of thunder.)
KIRK: That's not the way.
SPOCK: Evidently not. This is no ordinary machine, Captain. It may well possess a rudimentary intelligence.
KIRK: But it needs to eat. Frequently. So it can't have any great power reserves.
SPOCK: That may not be of any help. The Enterprise has only ten hours left in which to break free.
KIRK: What happens if Vaal weakens around feeding time? Spock, check the electromagnetic section of the astrophysics lab. Get an estimate of the total amount of energy being expended against the ship. Have them measure it hour by hour.
SPOCK: Acknowledged.
(McCoy joins them.)
MCCOY: What's going on, Jim?
KIRK: Mess call.
SPOCK: In my view, a splendid example of reciprocity.
MCCOY: It would take a computerised Vulcan mind such as yours to make that kind of a statement.
SPOCK: Doctor, you insist on applying human standards to non-human cultures. I remind you that humans are only a tiny minority in this galaxy.
MCCOY: There are certain absolutes, Mister Spock, and one of them is the right of humanoids to a free and unchained environment, the right to have conditions which permit growth.
SPOCK: Another is their right to choose a system which seems to work for them.
MCCOY: Jim, you're not just going to stand by and be blinded to what's going on here. These are humanoids, intelligent. They need to advance and grow. Don't you understand what my readings indicate? There's been no progress here in at least ten thousand years. This isn't life. It's stagnation.
SPOCK: Doctor, these people are healthy and they are happy. What ever you choose to call it, this system works, despite your emotional reaction to it.
MCCOY: It might work for you, Mister Spock, but it doesn't work for me. Humanoids living so they can service a hunk of tin.
KIRK: Gentlemen, I think this philosophical argument can wait until our ship's out of danger. Kirk here.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Scotty, sir. We have a reading on the power source Mister Spock requested. When we first monitored, it was generating alternating cycles totalling one hundred to the twentieth power Waltham units.
[Vaal]
KIRK: Did it maintain, Scotty?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: No, sir. Power's dropping bit by bit. Nominal, but a definite drain.
[Vaal]
KIRK: Good. Keep monitoring. How are you coming along with the circuit switchover?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: We're putting everything but the kitchen sink into impulse power, sir. It will take us another eight hours to complete the work.
[Vaal]
KIRK: That's cutting it a bit fine, Scotty.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, but if we don't break out, I'd rather we didn't have to wait too long for the end of it.
[Vaal]
KIRK: Kirk out.
[Hut]
MARTHA: Every time I think of the Enterprise burning up and us
KIRK: Yeoman, you're wasting energy.
MARTHA: Captain, we're trapped,
KIRK: Sit down, and have something to eat.
MARTHA: The Enterprise is up there
KIRK: That hasn't happened yet. I wonder what would happen? Yeoman, speculate. What would happen if someone on this planet died?
MARTHA: But they can't. You said that Vaal takes care of them.
KIRK: Accidents happen.
MARTHA: Yes, I suppose if someone were to fall off a cliff or something, that might upset the balance of the population. Then they would need a replacement.
KIRK: They'd need a replacement. Opinion, Mister Spock?
SPOCK: I see no alternative.
MARTHA: But these people, I mean, if they don't know anything about. What I mean is, they don't seem to have any natural er. I mean, how is it, done?
KIRK: Mister Spock? You're the science officer. Why don't you explain it to the young lady.
SPOCK: Well, I believe it's safe, (cough) safe to assume that they would receive the necessary instructions.
MCCOY: From a machine? That I'd like to see.
[Vaal]
AKUTA: I understand, Vaal. It shall be done.
[Village]
(Chekov and Landon are taking a romantic stroll together.)
MARTHA: You know, if it weren't for Vaal this place would be a paradise.
(They are watched by a local couple)
CHEKOV: Any place we can be together is paradise.
MARTHA: Pav, can the ship really break away?
CHEKOV: I don't know.
MARTHA: Will we be able to get back aboard?
CHEKOV: Martha, I don't know. But if we do have to stay here, would it be so very bad?
MARTHA: No, not if you're with me.
(They kiss .)
SAYANA: Why do you look like that?
MAKORA: The way they touched. I do not understand.
SAYANA: They were not angry. I think it was pleasant for them.
MAKORA: But what is to be gained? It is not a dance. It gathers no food. It does not serve Vaal. But it did seem as though it was, pleasant to them.
(He kisses the girl's cheek.)
SAYANA: It is pleasant, Makora.
MAKORA: Yes. They touched in this way.
They kiss properly and there is a roll of thunder.)
MAKORA: Vaal! He is angry.
AKUTA: The law is plain. I have given you the words of Vaal. Do you beg the lightning to strike?
SAYANA: We saw the strangers, the two of them, do this thing.
AKUTA: You copied them?
MAKORA: We meant no harm.
AKUTA: Vaal speaks truly to me. The newcomers are a danger. Tell the men of Vaal to meet me in the clear place when the strangers are asleep. It is Vaal's own words.
[Planet surface]
(The men are waiting for Akuta. He arrives with a blue melon and a very big stick. AKUTA: Vaal has spoken to me. His words are true. Hear them. We are to kill the strangers.
MAKORA: Kill, Akuta? We do not understand.
AKUTA: It is a thing to do, like, like feeding Vaal. Vaal explained it to me. I will show you. This (the melon) is the head of one of the strangers. Find a heavy stick. Come up from behind the stranger and do this.
(He swings his stick and smashes the melon to pieces.)
AKUTA: It is a simple thing. It is the word of Vaal. It will be done to all of them when the sun returns in the morning.
(But he looks worried.)
[Hut]
SPOCK: I am concerned, Captain. This may not be an ideal society, but it is a viable one.
KIRK: Bones was right. These people aren't living, they're existing. They don't create, they don't produce, they don't even think. They exist to service a machine.
SPOCK: If we do what it seems we must, in my opinion it will be in direct violation of the non-interference directive.
KIRK: These are people, not robots. They should have the opportunity of choice. We owe it to them to interfere.
SPOCK: Starfleet Command may think otherwise.
KIRK: I'll take my chances. Why don't you have a look around? Kirk to Enterprise. Mister Scott?
(Spock leaves)
SCOTT [OC]: Here, sir.
KIRK: How's it going, Scotty?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Almost ready, sir. We need half an hour yet.
[Hut]
KIRK: You realise that within forty five minutes, the ship will be pulled down into the atmosphere?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: I know that. As you said, that's cutting things fine.
[Hut]
KIRK: Yes, I
SPOCK: Captain!
KIRK: Kirk out. What is it?
SPOCK: Disturbing. The people of Vaal seem to have disappeared.
[Vaal]
SPOCK: Force field, Captain.
KIRK: Vaal, we are on a peaceful mission. We mean no harm to you or your people.
(The sky darkens.)
SPOCK: Variation in impulses, Captain. I believe it is reading us. A strong jump on all wavelengths.
(Lightning threatens.)
KIRK: Let's get out of here!
(But Spock is hit, with a nice hole in the back of his tunic.)
[Village]
KIRK: Bones!
MCCOY: Second degree burns. Not serious, but I'll bet they smart.
SPOCK: Doctor, you have an unsurpassed talent for understatement.
KIRK: Marple!
(The red-shirt is struck by Akuta. The other men are easily eluded, disarmed and dealt with.)
KIRK: Put them in the hut. Find out where the women are. Put them in there, too.
SPOCK: The good doctor was concerned that the Vaalians achieved true human stature. I submit there is no cause for worry. They've taken the first step. They've learned to kill.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: We're ready here, sir. All available power has been channelled into the impulse engines. We have twelve minutes before entering atmosphere.
[Village]
KIRK: All right, Scotty, put her in full reverse. Get her out of there.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Full reverse, Mister Kyle, all engines.
KYLE: Sir!
SCOTT: Captain, we're doing it. We're pulling away!
[Village]
KIRK: Scotty, what happened?
KYLE: It's no good, sir. There's only a few systems responding.
[Village]
SCOTT [OC]: Captain, we've pulled away a little. We gained maybe an hour, but we blew almost every system in the ship doing it.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: There's nothing left to try again. I guess you'll have to fire me, sir.
[Village]
KIRK: You're fired. Four hundred people
MCCOY: Jim
KIRK: They'll die because I couldn't see a warning sign. I had to follow orders, always orders.
(The gong sounds, and the people of Vaal try to leave the hut.)
CHEKOV: Get back in there.
MCCOY: Fine time to ring the dinner bell.
CHEKOV: Get back in there. Now!
KIRK: Bones, that's it. Stay with Chekov. Keep those people from feeding Vaal. Don't let them feed Vaal. Keep them in the hut. Mister Spock.
(They head off through the shrubs.)
KIRK: Scotty, do you still have phaser power?
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, but what
KIRK [OC]: Lock all banks on the co-ordinates of the energy field located down here.
[Vaal]
KIRK; On my command, commence firing on those co-ordinates.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Aye, sir, but they won't penetrate that force field.
[Vaal]
KIRK: If my guess is correct, they won't have to. Stand by.
[Hut]
AKUTA: Vaal calls to us. Let us go to him. He hungers. Please.
[Vaal]
SPOCK: Readings are getting weaker, Captain. Wide variation in energy transmissions, as though Vaal were trying to draw on other sources. KIRK: Tapping its energy cells.
SPOCK: I would assume so.
KIRK: Good. The ship's pulling away must have weakened it considerable. It has to be fed, but its reserve capacity could hold out for days.
SPOCK: If it had to reinforce its energy field to ward off a phaser attack, it would have to draw more heavily on its reserves.
KIRK: My plan exactly. Scotty.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Scott here, sir.
[Vaal]
KIRK: Scotty, commence firing and maintain.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Mister Kyle, all phasers commence firing.
[Vaal]
(Two red beams hit the edge of the force field and start turning it green.)
SPOCK: A tremendous upsurge in generated power, Captain. Obviously Vaal is trying to reinforce his energy field.
KIRK: Good. Let's see how long he can do it.
(The green glow arrives at the snake's head as the storm clouds gather. The lightning flashes, and small explosions go off inside Vaal. Smoke comes out of its mouth. Finally, the eyes stop glowing and the throat goes dark.)
KIRK: Scotty, cease fire.
(The sun breaks through the clouds again.)
SPOCK: No power generation at all, Captain. Vaal is dead.
KIRK: Mister Scott, status report.
[Bridge]
SCOTT: Tractor beam gone. Potency returning to antimatter pods.
[Vaal]
SCOTT [OC]: I'll have all engineering sections working on the circuits immediately. Transporter'll be ready in an hour.
KIRK: Scotty, you're re-hired. As soon as the transporter's fixed, form an engineering detail with full analytical equipment and beam them down. Kirk out. Chekov, Bones. Let those people go.
AKUTA: But it was Vaal who put the fruit on the trees, caused the rain to fall. Vaal cared for us.
KIRK: You'll learn to care for yourselves, with our help. And there's no trick to putting fruit on trees. You might enjoy it. You'll learn to build for yourselves, think for yourselves, work for yourselves, and what you create is yours. That's what we call freedom. You'll like it, a lot. And you'll learn something about men and women, the way they're supposed to be. Caring for each other, being happy with each other, being good to each other. That's what we call love. You'll like that, too, a lot. You and your children.
SAYANA: What are children?
KIRK: The little ones? Look like you? Just go on the way you're going. You'll find out.
[Corridor]
MCCOY: I don't agree with you at all, Mister Spock.
SPOCK: That's not unusual, Doctor.
MCCOY: Jim, I want you to hear this.
SPOCK: Captain, I'm not at all certain we did the correct thing on Gamma Trianguli Six.
MCCOY: We put those people back on a normal course of social evolution. I see nothing wrong in that.
KIRK: Well, that's a good object lesson, Mister Spock. It's an example of what can happen when a machine becomes too efficient, does too much work for you.
SPOCK: Captain, you are aware of the biblical story of Genesis.
KIRK: Yes, of course I'm aware of it. Adam and Eve tasted the apple and as a result were driven out of paradise.
SPOCK: Precisely, Captain, and in a manner of speaking, we have given the people of Vaal the apple, the knowledge of good and evil if you will, as a result of which they too have been driven out of paradise.
KIRK: Doctor, do I understand him correctly? Are you casting me in the role of Satan?
SPOCK: Not at all, Captain.
KIRK: Is there anyone on this ship who even remotely looks like Satan?
(McCoy and Kirk walk around Spock. McCoy is gazing intently at his ears.)
SPOCK: I am not aware of anyone who fits that description, Captain.
KIRK: No, Mister Spock. I didn't think you would be.
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